HIRING! CLASS A MODELS

SEEN taped to the glass wall panel of a Quezon City-based macho dancer bar:  HIRING! CLASS A MODELS, 18 to 25 years old, with pleasing personality, INQUIRE INSIDE.

What’s a Class A model?  Can the bar owner himself define a Class A model?  Who are these specimens?  If there is a Class A model, certainly there is also a Class B model.  Where on earth can you find a Class C entertainer or stripper?

“Am I what you call a Class D or E model,” a pal mused as he studied the notice.

How do Philippine islanders define “pleasing personality”?  Oftentimes, Trog’s interviewees would equate pleasing personality with good looks, sexy body, long height, flaw-less skin, and pretty or handsome face.

Can one inquire without applying for the job?  And can one inquire outside?  Bwahahaha!

An innocent-looking twenty-something walked the whole stretch of Timog Avenue hoping to land a job as a waiter in one of those bars dotting the every busy thoroughfare.  He saw this same notice and inquired about any openings for a waiter.  The scheming floor manager he happened to talk to convinced him to work as a “model” instead of as a waiter.  The jobless, rural guy, desperate to find work in the metropolis, reluctantly said “yes” and was taken in that same day.

If you were to post a “JOB VACANCY NOTICE” outside your own strip bar, would you consider displaying the following notice? :

WANTED MALE STRIPPERS

of legal age,cute or handsome, 5’7” is the minimum height, chiseled body or athletic type, courteous, smartly dressed, well-endowed, has even skin tone, no facial and back pimples, nice set of teeth, no bad breath, no hair strands growing out of the nose, clean ears, clean and trimmed finger and toe nails, no facial hair, pink lips, knows how to dance and willing to be trained, looks and smells fresh, happy disposition, like to work with people, know some English

How would people react upon seeing and going through the notice sign?

Self-righteous, “sin-less moralists” might troop to your bar and protests against what they might label as lewdness and vulgarity; state-licensed uniformed extortionists would assault your establishment, haul you, your employees and your patrons to the police station where they would eventually extort dough from each of the arrested individuals, as is tradition; but some passersby would probably just shrug it off, take a good laugh and go about their daily business.

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2 comments

    1. Hi,

      You go straight to the bar of your choice, that is, around 9pm or 10pm. You go up to the doorman or any tranny managers you see outside the bar or in the lobby and tell them you want to work. They may require you to audition so remember the boy scout motto: be prepared. That is, bring your boots, a pair of sexy denim shorts or bikini and your music material.

      Good luck.

      The Gonogran

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